So I recently wrote a blog called Owen: A Cloth-Diaper Wearing Baby Potty Trained by 18 Months. In it I describe how my sister successfully trained her son by introducing the potty when Owen was around one. Cooper turned one in February and so I brought it out. The Potty.
When Cooper was 11 months, I decided to try putting him on the big potty, with the potty-seat on so he wouldn’t fall in. I wasn’t expecting him to pee but I wanted to let him give it a try. Much to my dismay, he arched his back, straightened his legs and began shrieking. I picked him up and he clung to me, looking at the potty with a mixture of fear and loathing. I tried again. This time he was holding onto me so tightly his knuckles were white. I gave up trying because I didn’t want to traumatize him. At this point I realized that potty training Cooper might not be as easy as I had hoped, partly because his personality is much different than the personalities of his older sisters.
Both Lauren and Kate are what I like to call “Fireballs” because they both have fiery tempers, strong personalities and are extremely friendly and social–with everyone they meet. Cooper, on the other hand, is clingier and more attached to Mama. (I have to admit, I secretly love it!). And while both of his sisters can’t wait to get on the mechanical horses that cost a penny to ride at the grocery store–even as young toddlers–Cooper wants nothing to do with them. In fact, he had the very same reaction to the horse as he did to the potty.
So, back to potty-training. I’ve also let Cooper run around diaper-less a bit so that he can learn how his body works and what happens when he pees. So far he has peed on the floor at least half a dozen times, but luckily always on the hardwood. Then, he usually tries to stick his hands in it and splash around OR he slips and falls in the puddle. Oh well. No one ever said potty-training was pretty–or hygienic.
So, as Cooper enters his fourteenth month, I am going to try to remain optimistic–and keep working slowly on introducing to the potty. Maybe I’ll give him some treats while he sits on it so he will have a “positive association.” I’m pretty sure I got that idea from the Dog Whisperer. Wish me luck!
Oh my. We’re a long way from potty training (LO is 4 months), but this is my biggest fear (for now…) about it — that he’ll respond just like Cooper did. Good luck!
My kids have been like that too – arching their backs, etc. It has taken both of my kids until they were over 2yo to be willing to sit on the potty. I did try earlier, but it was just to much whining for me. I tried singing songs, doing it just before bath, etc, and nothing helped. Now my son is 29 mo and starting to really learn. He has successes for sure, but he isn’t diaper free by any stretch. But, I am not pushing it since our summer will involve car trips, etc where having him in a diaper isn’t a terrible thing.
I started my daughter using the potty at 8 weeks old. She’s always hated wet diapers so I took an elimination communication class. You learn what their cues are when they need to go. It’s similar to learning their cues when they are hungry, tired, etc. Now at 4 1/2 months I use the infant hold to have her use the potty. My hope is that using the potty from the beginning will get her used to it and not frightened of it. Plus she also will never get used to and comfortable with wet diapers.
Going through the same thing. This is my first cloth diaper baby and while super independent he also is very clingy loves to be held and total mama’s boy. (I kinda love it too) A little over a year old I decided to get the potty training on a roll. He can sit still and yes, totally terrified of the big potty. So I held of a couple month until his attention span improved and he was willing to sit on the big potty. Still no matter how long I got him to sit as soon as he got off he would immediately pee and proceed to play in it. I thought my husband was going to have a heart attack. Into diaper a couple more month. Now he is 17 month and every time he pees the diaper is immediately discarded and tossed across the room… so time to try again. Hopefully I get him to stop playing in toilet. Good Luck.
I am also trying the same thing. We got a potty just after she turned one, and now at 16 months she sat on it for the first time last night. In the past she has been terrified of it – but as time has gone by she has started to play with it (ours has 3 parts, a bottom the turns into a step stool, the seat that also fits on the toilet, and the bucket for the seat). She is getting more accustomed to it, so I hope that she just needed some time. We will see how it goes!
I have a 10.5 month old and I have been trying to decide when to start. I fear he will react exactly as your son has! I’m hoping August and September will be great months to run around naked, lol!
I did sort of a modified version of EC with my daughter in that we held her over the potty from even before she could sit. She never had any fear issues because it was so normal to her and she was potty trained quite well before 2 and at 3 is almost completely independent on the potty, which is so nice with a newborn now, I’m not constantly running to help her! I’ve already had our son pee in the potty a couple times and I plan to follow the same pattern I did with our daughter, so we’ll see how it works for him!
My little one, now 17 months, had the same reaction to the potty. To me it just means she isn’t quite ready. I’m in no rush to potty train so its not a big deal!
Good luck! My daughter is 11 months, and we’re just now starting to think about potty training. I hope she is receptive to it.
Hang in there.. My daughter is 19 months.. and we just started part time cloth diapering (we were a little late to the game).. anyways.. in the past 2 months she has made great strides towards using the potty… not everytime.. not perfect.. but very much so I think because she is learning how her bowels operate by wearing cloth diapers. (Even part time)
My new little one is only four months old now. I sure hope he trains earlier than his oldest brother, who was not trained until he was three. Sure, I love cloth diapers, but poopy toddler diapers are so gross. LOL!
That picture is so cute!!!
LO is only 4 months old now, I am hoping being CD’d will help with potty training.
His personality sounds just like my sons’. Eli was potty trained at 20 months for about 2 months and then became scared of the potty and of pooping. He just started going in his pants all the time when before he had had 2 accidents total in 2 months! We did the 3 day potty training and it worked like a charm for 2 months. We have taken a break so he can get over his fears – I don’t want to damage the kid by forcing him to go. Your son is pretty young yet, I wouldn’t be too concerned if I were you. Hang in there! 🙂
My son thinks it is so funny to sit on the potty but is oblivious to the concept of what is to be done there. He is 15 months old, hopefully persistence will work. He is my first child so this potty training things is all new to me.
My son occasionally pees in the big toilet, and what he discovered was that kneeling on the toilet seat and steadying himself with his hands was more stable. I can’t remember if a 14-month-old is dexterous enough to do that or not, but maybe that would work. Or small separate toddler potty might also work. I’ve started putting my 10-month-old on a froggy potty occasionally (when her diaper’s dry and she hasn’t wet for a while) and have had some successes. I’m hoping the peer pressure will get my 2.5 year old more interested (he knows what he’s doing, just isn’t motivated and is very resistant to being told what to do), and that the baby will be thinking about it earlier.
This story makes me wish I had hardwood floors! I’m not looking forward to potty training with carpets…
Good luck! Sounds like you are doing everything right, now it is just up to Cooper 🙂
Good luck! You’re doing great!
Thanks for this series of articles….. I have a 4 month old in cloth and I’m hoping to have her trained early. Looking to learn a little from your experience with Cooper! 🙂
i am also very glad to only have hardwood floors at our house. with the two boys we flooded them many many dozen times. out third boy is 15 months. i don’t expect him to start before he turns 3, although he is the first one in cloth… you never know….
i have been told, as I’m sure you have as well, that boys don’t potty train as quickly as girls. i have an almost 5 year old son who took years to train (still wears diapers to bed), and a daughter who started training herself before 18 months. but beyond the gendered difference, i think that you are right, it is a matter of personality. Which means that moms shouldn’t take it personally (or, ahem, make other moms feel bad about their big boys in diapers! how is that helpful?), but we do just because we are moms and it’s one more thing to feel bad about.
Genevieve, my oldest wore diapers to bed until the age of 5 and my middle child is 4 and still wearing diapers to bed–both girls! Cooper might just be the same. No judgement here!
I was so scared to start potty training my oldest and waited until she was three. I decided to go cold turkey and let her run around in panties. She literally potty trained in one week. It was super easy. We didn’t use cloth with her and to this day I think about all that money wasted on pull ups for a year thinking they would help. Ugh. I hope our littlest one will train much earlier since she’s in cloth full time.
My daughter is is 17 months and i haven’t tried putting her on the potty yet. I’m really in no rush. For the last little while though I have had her watch each time I dump one of her poopy diaper so she can understand and see that her poop is supposed to go in the toilet. Hopefully this will help as we start.
I definitely enjoyed reading this. My three children are all so different from one another when it came to pottying. And the funny thing, the one I had in disposables (the oldest) was the one who had learned to potty by between age 18m-2yo. My others, cloth diapered, have taken longer to get the hang of it…and I’ve also done part-time EC’ing with each of them. Go figure. lol
My daughter is 16 mo and I’ve been debating getting her a potty. I don’t think I’m aiming for her to use it, use it right now but hopefully I won’t have a 3 yo still in diapers.
My oldest was totally potty trained by 18 months. My youngest, at 16 months expresses absolutely NO interest in being without a diaper. She still nurses about ever two hours too. Sigh. I guess they all do it at their own time…
Mine was that way at 13 months too, but then at 15 months he started asking to use the potty just like his big brother…no segway at all, just flipped the switch one day. Gotta love all or nothing kids!
we are working on this as well.
I just found this blog and your series on potty training. My toddler sounds a lot like your son. It never ceases to amaze me how different children can be, even within the same family.
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